New York (AP) – Few, but scary moments at all The bullet was attacked by conservative activist Charlie Kirk It was cascaded across the internet around my neck.
Even if you watch it carelessly, onlookers far from the University of Utah crowds can get a potentially bloody glimpse of his shooting, The chaos of the result. This is the product of a digital-first world that is easily accessible and often virtually inevitable due to the presence of smartphones and social media, where current events are easily accessible.
And of course, among those who saw it were children, teens and other young people. People who live with their mobile phones are actually attached and are often much more chronically online than their parents.
It raises the question that modern parents sadly need to ask more frequently. How do you talk about what’s going on with your child, what they’re seeing and hearing?
Don’t ignore it
It is a fundamental parental impulse to protect children, protect them from harsh realities and complex situations, and think they are too young to know how the world is unsafe or scary.
But when it comes to the real world around us, experts say it is not realistic. Information is everywhere.
“For parents, assuming that their children are not exposed to this is not a good way to get closer,” says Jodie Kuas, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Irvine. “Kids talk at school, kids overhear teachers, adults overhearing conversations with their parents.”
That’s only exacerbated by phones, tablets and other technologies that connect the child, even if parents try to set screen restrictions or parental controls.
“In this adult world, it’s easy to think that protecting yourself is very easy from now on. Of course, you don’t need to see it. Of course you can turn your back,” says Chris Perry, executive director of children and screens and executive director of the Institute for Digital Media and Children’s Development. “But what’s happening with kids, especially in the context of social media, is that the algorithms are so sophisticated and the feeds are so tuned, you should assume that your child is exposed to this event through sources you didn’t choose.”
Don’t assume they know everything too
When talking to young people, Lyana Ellis Anderson, an associate professor of social work at Columbia University’s Department of Social Work, parents should try to get a sense of what their children have about the event at hand, rather than rushing to the premise.
“They’re seeing what’s actually pictured the event, or they could be doctors or altered due to different software in editing or AI,” says Anderson. “So it’s really important to us to get a sense of what they think they know.”
First, I’ll handle my feelings
Of course, if parents are trying to reassure their children about their safety or talk about what they see or what the nation is going to happen, parents should take the time to first acknowledge their feelings and thoughts.
“Parents need to stop and hold their breath and prepare. As they say, put on their own oxygen masks – you can listen more steady and carefully and reduce your reactivity so that you can process your emotions before you start talking to your child,” says Perry.
Kuass says parents need to remember that they are role models for their children.
“If a parent is very upset, it really doesn’t matter what they say to their children, as parents are so struggling that they can’t regulate their emotions. They’re probably afraid,” she says.
Let’s have a continuous conversation
Kate Gillen’s 10-year-old son doesn’t even have his phone yet, but he was next to his mother in his Virginia home when Kirk’s shooting and subsequent death warnings began to be warned on her phone.
“He was visibly shaken by it and wanted to know who did it,” Gillen says. They talked a bit about it and she promised that he could talk more about it if needed.
She knows that it’s not the last conversation about the incident as he talks to his schoolmates and others. And as he grows up, gets his own phone and joins the bigger world, it’s not the last time he’ll need this type of conversation.
“As much as I want to protect him… he’ll be exposed to it,” she says. “And I can’t keep him away from it, but all I can do is give him the tools to understand and process what he feels.”
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